Saturday, March 31, 2012

The Dark Lego Rises

Here's the trailer for the Dark Knight Rises done completely in Legos. At this point I think it's safe to assume that any movie trailer is going to get the Lego treatment at some point. As much as I enjoy these I wish some uber-nerd would branch out and do one of these in something other than Lego. Maybe Capsula or Robotix, now that would be awesome.

Friday, March 30, 2012

Game of Ponies

Were you aware that My Little Pony is back? Not only are they back they've got this whole male fan base called Bronys, they have conventions and everything. I find the whole thing incredibly unsettling, however this resurgence has led to this Game of Thrones/My Little Pony mash-up. So I guess the Bronys are ok in my book.. as long as they stay 50 yards away from my son.

Thursday, March 29, 2012

60% of the time Links

Hacking Scarlett Johansson using google and gumption. The heartwarming story of some guy on the internet that decided he wanted to see Scar-jo nekkid. Remember kids, never give up on your dreams!

Seriously though, this is a really interesting article.

Ron Burgundy announces Anchorman 2. I'm a man who discovered the wheel and built the Eiffel Tower out of metal and brawn. That's what kind of man I am. You're just a woman with a small brain. With a brain a third the size of us. It's science

Flexible e-ink displays are now in mass production. These displays are the bomb diggity. You think a Kindle is cool now, wait until you can roll it up and smack someone over the head with it.

Monster Cables vs Coat Hanger, who you got? I've said this before and I'll say it again, anyone that buys Monster products should have all their money taken from them and given to a food shelter. And don't get me started on those ridiculous Beats by Dre headphones.

Grown Up Alien Ninja Turtles

If you've been paying any attention to the blog this week, you already know Michael Bay is producing a Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles movie called Ninja Turtles where the turtles are from space (don't worry bro, the backstory will be rich and complex), also they're not really teenagers they just act like it.

I thought it was a bad idea until I saw the new intro. I think it's pretty sweet.

Wednesday, March 28, 2012

That's a dozen red cards

Sweet Christmas, this video is the balls. There's no real set up, it's a high school soccer game and a girl gets fouled. She then decided to take like 20 pounds of flesh from the chick that tripped her.

Of course it all ends on a happy note, the girl doing all the punching was charged with 3rd degree assault.

Safety Not Guaranteed

If there's two things I'm a sucker for it's movies about time travel and movies set in Seattle. If there's a third thing I'm a sucker for it's Fun Dip. Man that stuff is awesome. When you're done you get to eat the stick! It took me forever to figure out that the stick tastes like cream soda.

Anyhoo, here's a trailer for a new movie called Safety Not Guaranteed, based on an internet meme from like forever ago. It stars that guy from The new Girl, that girl from Parks and Rec and that guy from the League. It's like a indie film supergroup. I'll bet you money I don't see it in the theater complain that America is stupid when it tanks and then love it when it comes out on DVD. I call that move the Scott Pilgrim.

Tuesday, March 27, 2012

Some people stand in the Links

Baywatch: The Oral History. THIS IS MINDBLOWING! But it's about Baywatch you say, how mind blowing can it really be you ask.. "Donna D'Errico declined to be interviewed. In an e-mail, D'Errico told of her plans to climb Mount Ararat to search for Noah's Arc." That's right, Noah's freaking Ark. And D'Errico's the one without the giant coke habit, I'm looking at you Bleeth, Jackson, Hasselhoff, etc. Seriously, I'm like halfway through this thing and It's just awesome.

btw, was there a hotter woman on TV in 1991 than Erika Eleniak?

8 Forgotten '80s Live-action children's sci-fi series. Oh I did not forget about you Captain Power. I craved one of those stupid captain power light gun vehicles for SOOOO long. The kind that you could shoot things on the TV and rack up points. Then when I finally got one for Christmas the show was moved to 6am on Saturdays. I think I played with it once.

James Cameron's X-Men movie could have had Bob Hoskins as Wolverine. My favorite part of this story told by X-Men writer Chris Claremont is how quickly James Cameron lost all interest in an X-men movie. All it took was Stan Lee saying "So, I hear you like Spider-Man too?". Then like a thousand lawyers showed up and 15 years later we finally saw a Spider-Man movie. Thanks for nothing Stan.

Hotties of the Hunger Games. A little something for the ladies.

A trailer for the Total Recall Trailer

I'll give the producers of the Total Recall remake a bit of credit. Having a trailer for your trailer premier seems like a very Philip K Dick thing to do.

I've been thinking about it and I'm not really that upset that they remade Total Recall. I mean Total Recall was awesome and it still is. If this new movie sucks it's not going to make the Arnold version any worse is it? It's not like we're dealing with a sequel, or prequel, intended to add or subtract from the original movies mythos. It's a complete reboot and I guess it's supposed to be more true to the book. I say why not? It's not like it's Michael Bay ruining Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles or anything. Damn you Michael Bay! Stop pissing all over the toys of my youth!

The Mother effing Pterodactyl

This video by The Oatmeal and Sarah Donner is amazing. My son LOVED it! He was dancing and everything. Then I realized he's starting to learn more words everyday and I think his days of watching youtube clips filled with swears is swiftly coming to an end. Oh well, it was a amazing ride.

Monday, March 26, 2012

and there goes your net neutrality

A couple months ago Comcast announced that it would bring streaming cable to Xbox Live. Great news if you want to get rid of a cable box and replace it with your Xbox. Not so great if you want to ditch cable altogether. The internet collectively yawned. Until today that is, when someone discovered that Comcast's Xfinity on Demand service for Xbox live doesn't count against a Comcast internet user's 250 gig data cap.

Why is that really such a big deal? Comcast would argue that they're providing the same service, via their own internet pipes, that they already provide using their cable pipes (yes it's the same pipe, and yes I know it's not a real pipe). Making sure the Xfinity on Demand service isn't restricted by a bandwidth cap is just good business, right? Well it might be good for Comcast but it's not so good for Netflix or Blockbuster or Pandora or Vimeo or Youtube or really anyone else that streams anything on the internet.

It's a slippery slope my friends. Sure it starts with a data cap, but next year maybe it's an "optimization" for Xfinity on demand followed by an optimization for devices that use Xfinity on demand like your iPad and your Xbox (but not your PS3 or your xoom tablet). Before you know it blogger loads 3 times faster than wordpress, and CBS online looks like dogshit because it's constantly buffering.

But hey that's the free market, right? If Comcast doesn't give the people what they want the people will just go to the next cable internet provider. Oh yeah, there isn't one because local counties sell their cable rights to a single bidder. USA USA USA!

Game of Thrones: Nowhere to hide

Ok, so this new trailer for season 2 of Game of Thrones is really just a 30 second TV spot. Still.. it's pretty awesome.

I'm only a third of the way through the second book but I swear if this doesn't end with Tyrion riding on the back of a dragon burning all the other Lannisters (and Sansa) with fire I'm going to be pissed.

Doctor Who Season 7 trailer

About 6 months ago my wife and I dropped Comcast and switched to Dish network for our cable TV needs. It was purely a price issue. Dish had the absolute cheapest monthly rate for HD service with a DVR. Of course that meant giving up AMC and BBC America so I never got to see the second half of the sixth season of Doctor Who (or the Christmas special for that matter). Now I have to wait for it on netflix like a sucker.

Anyhoo, here's the trailer for season 7. It's looks incredibly bad-ass.

Friday, March 23, 2012

Facebook might sue that guy that didn't hire you

"I notice you were listening to Avril Lavigne on spotify yesterday"

I posted something a while ago about how a growing number of employers use Facebook to weed out applicants, or maybe I didn't. I can't find the post to link to, so maybe it's something I just meant to post. Either way corporate America just took turned that shit up to 11. Take it away ars technica:

Facebook has taken a stand against what it calls a "distressing increase" in reports of employers demanding the Facebook passwords of employees and job applicants.

One such report came from the Associated Press this week, which detailed cases of interviewers asking applicants for Facebook usernames and passwords, a clear invasion of privacy if we've ever heard of one. Employers examining applicants' and employees' activity on social media networks isn't new—but typically it is restricted to what information users have made publicly available to everyone. Facebook said it could seek policy changes or file lawsuits to prevent employers from demanding passwords.

via ars technia

Now I'm not a fancy law er but it seems like there is no way this is legal. Once upon a time I was in a position where I had to hire and fire people (pro tip: if you cry while I'm trying to fire you, I will totally cave) and there were all these rules about what you could ask and what you couldn't say when you were interviewing someone. What kind of giant Michael bay's Devastator's brass balls does someone have to have to ask for your Facebook password on an interview? Why stop there? Why not ask for your e-mail password, your ATM pin or your wife's favorite drink?

I'm implying they want the password to your wife's pants...

never mind.

Thursday, March 22, 2012

Wrap these links

How Gamers are ruining Gaming. Oh man, this times a thousand. I love on line gaming, especially first person shooters like Call of Duty and Halo, but The amount of assholes you have to wade through to find a lobby of normal people is maddening. People yelling fag, homo and noob isn't as bad on Battlefield 3 as it is on say Halo, but you still get plenty of people who are just looking to ruin the experience for everyone else. I blame all the rap music kids are listening to these days.

Why Big Bang Theory Reruns Are One of the Most Powerful Forces on Cable. I knew Big Bang Theory was popular but I had no idea it was this popular. I hope non-nerds aren't just watching it to make fun of nerds. If they are I think they'll be very disappointed when they meet some nerds in real life. For instance, I rarely wear my comic book t-shirts to work.

It's a game of Thrones House Party. HBO released a promo video for all the major houses in Game of Thrones. It's cool and all but they reuse a lot of footage from the first season, so it's not that cool.

6 Psychotic Punishments Doled out by Superheroes. Some of these are Brutal. I'm starting to think the whole superhero registration act wasn't that bad of an idea.

Mike Stone's Superintendent says Porn Star can't come to Prom. Update to yesterday's story about the kid that asked all those Porn Stars to his prom. One said yes, and then the school said no. I thought we lived in 'murica not communist france!

The X-Men Disappoint Magneto

You know there's some huge Dazzler fan out there that just thinks this is crap. They're all like "Back in Uncanny X-Men issue #285 Dazzler beat the Juggernaut single handedly, so she is quite the formidable foe. She certainly would have more chance doing damage to Magneto that Wolverine or Nightcrawler would"... Nerds.

Story Time: Thanks in part to the numerous arcade emulators available, I beat the X-Men Arcade game just a couple years ago one slow Friday at work. I'm guessing the people in my office thought I was really killing those TPS reports that day.

Wednesday, March 21, 2012

The Walking Dead Videogame looks boooring

I'm 99.9 percent sure the only reason we're seeing a Walking Dead video game is that last year Robert Kirkman saw the trailer for Dead Island and thought he could do better (wrong).

I think this is an xBox live arcade game, at least I hope it is 'cause it looks awful. I get that they're aiming for "a comic book come to life" look with all the cell shading, the problem is that The Walking Dead comic doesn't look anything like this. If they were actually using Charlie Adlard's art as a reference point then someone needs to get fired.

Tuesday, March 20, 2012

Links in a half shell

Michael Bay doesn't understand what a mutant is. Because God hates nerds, Michael Bay is producing a new Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles movie where the Turtles aren't actually mutants but space aliens. When asked why he hates nerds Bay reportedly CGI dropped some sunglasses on his face and said deal with it.

Minnesota Teen Asks a bunch of porn stars to his prom, on twitter. Tell me Sandy Cage isn't the best pornstar name out there? Works great for a boy or a girl!

How much do you pay for each of those channels you don't watch. The math here is way way off, but the topic and discussion that follow is very interesting. No matter how much you may hate cable bundling, if we didn't have it all we'd be left with is 10 channels full of Nascar and According to Jim reruns. What would I do without Ninja Warrior and live Comic-Con coverage?

25 hilarious vintage comic book covers. Funny how in almost all of these Superman is being a dick.

Monday, March 19, 2012

That one scene you like, It sucks

As it turns out when you slow down the only cool scene in Star Wars Episode I: The Phantom Menace it sucks.

I would really like to see the same kind of breakdown for the final battle in return of the Jedi. There's a lot less jumping and ducking and acting like an idiot in that scene, I bet it holds up way better than this.

Abe Honestly hates these Vampires

Here's the second trailer for Abraham Lincoln: Vampire Hunter. It still looks redonkulously fun.

Do you supposed the guy that wrote the book heard little tiny cash register noises every time he typed a letter? I wouldn't be surprised if he didn't make it past typing the title without a studio exec showing up at his house with a suitcase full of cash.

Also I really hope this becomes a franchise. Like every year we get a different president fighting a different sort of monster. Calvin Coolidge: Sasquatch Tracker, William Taft: Moleman Destroyer, Richard Nixon: Alien Assassin, etc.

Sunday, March 18, 2012

New Prometheus trailer

Sweet Christmas this movie looks the bomb diggity. I think I've mentioned this before, my favorite scene in Alien is when the crew of the Nostromo enters the alien ship and encounters the Space Jockey. Not only does Prometheus look awesome all on it's own, but I'm totally pumped to find out the back story of the Space Jockey.

It might sounds crazy, considering the boxes and boxes of comics I own, but I think I'm looking forward to this movie more than The Avengers.

Friday, March 16, 2012

Lollipop Chainsaw vs the Bosses of Zombie Rock

Lollipop Chainsaw has another new trailer, and it's just to bizarre not to share. In it we get a sneak peak at some of the bosses the game has to offer. One in particular shouts swear words that materialze and attack you.

That's pretty cool.

Today was a good day

Here's scenes from Ice Cube the movie star mashed up with songs from Ice Cube the rap legend.

A. Straight out of Compton is still a great song.

B. Ice Cube is a terrible actor.

Thursday, March 15, 2012

These Links might be it for the day

Robert Downey Jr. Might Be Anonymously Claiming Hayden Panettiere Was A Child Prostitute. This is such a crazy rumor that there's no way it's true. Of course it's so crazy I had to link to it. The gist is that there's this underage Hollywood sex ring going on involving a bunch of kid actors and actresses, and somehow Robert Downey Jr. is anonymously confirming it on-line. Crazy, right? But somehow totally believable.

The Creator of Unreal Engine says consoles have 6 to 8 years left. This sounds about right to me. We'll probably get one more generation of consoles and then everything will be on the cloud. Essentially you'll buy a controller and the entire game will stream straight to your TV or handheld. It won't matter how fast your computer is or how powerful your device is because all the processing will take place in the cloud. The only thing keeping it from happening sooner is that a lot of people still have assy internet connections. Once the grid is solid there will be no reason to ever play offline.

10 Geek to Chic movie makeovers. No, no, no, no, anyone but her! Not... Janie Briggs! Guys, she's got glasses and a ponytail! Aw, look at that, she's got paint on her overalls, what is that? Guys, there's no way she could be prom queen!

6 horrifying Implications of the Harry Potter Universe. I'm glad I'm not the only one that thinks its absurd that none of the Wizards in HP know how to use a cell phone. Seriously, he who should not be named would have killed everyone if all the death eaters had IM.

Wednesday, March 14, 2012

Happy π Day

Remember kids, failure is just success rounded down.

via DinosaurComics

In the Face!

If you had told me yesterday, when I was all mopey and depressed about the futility of life, that today I would get to use my "little kids getting beaned in the head" tag twice I would have told you "meh"... yesterday really sucked.

the dirtiest 12 year old soccer player in the world

First off let me apologize for the awful quality of this video. It literally looks like someone captured it with their camera off a computer screen playing the video. However if you can get past that, and the 20-30 seconds of boredom at the beginning you'll find glorious video of some 12 year old just crushing kids on a soccer field in Hong Kong. If you really want just skip to the 1:36 mark where he kicks some poor kid in the head.

story time: Last week my rec team was getting blasted 4-1, 5-1 something like that. None of our midfielders (except you Guenna) were getting back on defense and when we actually gained possession of the ball we couldn't string 2 passes together. Hell, we couldn't string one pass together. Anyhoo, this one guy on the other team had 3 goals and after the third I decided that the next time he got the ball I was going to foul him, hard. Now I've never been a dirty player, it's been years since my last yellow card, but there's only so many step-overs and pull backs you can take from a guy before you start to lose it. Especially when the game is essentially over and the rest of your team has decided that defense is for sissies.

Long story long, I tried to trip the guy (in the box no less!) and I very unexpectedly got all ball. It was the most disappointing clean tackle I've ever made.

Ultimate Tazer Ball is a thing

It's official, I've decided to take my talents to the local Ultimate Tazer Ball team. What? Kent doesn't have an Ultimate Tazer Ball team? We have minor league hockey, lingerie football, a frisbee golf course in the park that the green river killer dumped a couple bodies but no Ultimate Tazer Ball? That's an outrage! I'm outraged. I swear if I don't get to play some Ultimate Tazer ball soon I'm going to start tazering people at random, right after I throw a hilariously over sized soccer ball at their face of course.

Tuesday, March 13, 2012

Battlefield 3, before and after

So our good friends at Electronic Arts announced a new Battlefield 3 expansion pack today. It's called Close Quarters and as the name would suggest it's a bunch of new maps with an emphasis on close quarter combat.

I'm pumped for two reasons. Frist is that I suck at the vehicles in Battlefield 3. Sure it's cool that they're there and I've actually racked up my longest kill streak in an M1-A1, but overall I prefer the smaller maps. Second is.. would you look at that enviromental damage in the picture above?! Blowing through a wall and killing a dude is my favorite part of the operation metro map. Also it reminds me of a level in Red Faction 2, where you storm an office building and just blow everything to pieces. I can not wait to wreck shop.

Also there's 10 new weapons, so you know, that's cool. Catch the new trailer here. Catch me on xBox live user tag KevFun, I'll be the guy shooting at empty cubicles.

Monday, March 12, 2012

Batman and Robin the Musical

So we all know Batman and Robin is pretty much one of the worst comic book movies of all time. However, as it turns out it's a fantastic musical.

BTW, the Mr Freeze suit in Batman and Robin looks just like the one in Arkham City. I would pay a million xBox live points to get have every character in Arkham City Schumachered.

The Wampug Strikes Back

You win internet.

Friday, March 9, 2012

Snap into these links

Why Spider-man is better than Batman. Chris Sims from ComicsAlliance on why Spider-Man is absolutely, without a doubt, the best comic book character of all time. Nuff Said.

10 more jokes to make about the Hulk Hogan sex tape. Oh you didn't know? Your ass better call somebody! Seriously, the only good thing about a Hulk Hogan sex tape is all the jokes that can be made about a Hulk Hogan sex tape.

Topher Grace gives George Lucas the ol George Lucas. From what I understand young Eric Foreman is learning how to be a film director, his first self given assignment was to edit Star Wars Episodes 1-3 into one good, coherant film. From what I've heard he's done it, someone get to bootlegging!

Star Trek Warp Drive could prove deadly. Long story short a theoretical warp drive would create a giant explosion as it left and then again as it entered normal space. Sounds like we've finally perfected space exploration the 'merican way.

BioShock Infinite's Heavy Hitters will hit you heavily

This is sort of a new trailer for BioShock Infinite. There's about 20 seconds of game footage and like 2 minutes of nerds talking about robot George Washington or something. It looks awesome. I never did play BioShock 2 but I loved the first one. I've been told that the story for 2 wasn't as good, but the fighting mechanics were better. I think I might just skip it and go straight to Infinite.

Wednesday, March 7, 2012

These Links Graduate

The never changing iPad proposition. This is something to think about before you start going on and on about how awesome "the new iPad" is. I get it, it's another iPad and it's a cool way to play angry birds. Thanks.

The 10 greatest Star Wars Micro Machines playsets. Oh man were these things cool. They were just out of my toy playing age, but even as a 14 year old, man did I lust after these things. Speaking of Star Wars and being 14, I'm rereading the Admiral Thrawn trilogy. That's some good stuff. It's hard remembering a time when Star Wars wasn't totally over-saturated.. he says while drinking green tea from his Boba Fett coffee mug.

Trucker's Friend. And we have a winner for greatest zombie/robot/carrot-top apocalypse weapon ever. This all-purpose, all-in-one tool incorporates an axe, spanner, hammer, nail puller, tire chain hook, pry bar, and lever into one bad-ass looking mama-jamma.

Megan Fox isn't allowed to watch 90210. To be fair to Brian Austin Green if you were him would you let Megan Fox watch this?

Looking good Pop-pop

This commercial for is effing fantastic. If I hadn't just bought a super fancy Norelco with 3d floating head technology I'd sign up in a heartbeat.

Tuesday, March 6, 2012

Rush Limbaugh is a giant slut hooker

Unless you've been playing your advanced copy of Mass Effect 3 24 hours a day for the last 5 days, you've probably heard about this Rush Limbaugh/Sandra Fluke slut controversy. Long story short, Rush Limbaugh called some random woman a slut because she believes her birth control should be covered by insurance while she's in college.

For whatever horrible sadistic reason I've yet to put a finger on, I listen to a lot of talk radio. Over the last couple days it's amazing how many right wing talking heads have come to Rush's defense. Oh they pretend to not defend him, but they do. They say he shouldn't have used the words slut or prostitute but then they immediately start excusing what he did. He's a comedian you have to give him some leeway. People on the left say hurtful things all the time. Obama's a secret Muslim terrorist, etc. It's not what he said it's how he said it that's the problem. Which when you listen to what he's implying is complete horseshit. We can have a very serious and frank argument about what should and shouldn't be covered by public insurance, but what we shouldn't do is write off everyone concerned about the availability of birth control as degenerates and sinners. It's not the fact that he called this woman a slut, its the fact that he equates birth control with slutting it up that's really offensive.

It's figuratively driving me insane. Thank God for Stephen Colbert.

Monday, March 5, 2012

Assassin's Creed III will tomahawk chop you with joy

If you're lucky enough to have 3 monies and no kids you've probably already bought, played and are bored with Mass Effect 3. Well lucky you, you lucky jerk, because here comes Assassins Creed III.

Truth be told I'm not a huge Assassins Creed fan. I have the second one and I played it for all of 30 minutes. I could never really get into the controls, which looking back on it seems kind of weird because it's pretty similar to Batman Arkham City, which I love. Maybe it's time to pop the game back in and give it another try. Oh yeah, This trailer for Assassins Creed III looks amazing.

Would you hit it?

Would you hit it episode #14 answers many of life's greatest questions. Like what would happen if you hit a spool of CDs with a baseball bat, or what would happen if you hit a grapefruit with a baseball bat, or what would happen if you hit a bag of corn starch with a baseball bat?

I guess we'll have to wait for episode #15 to find out what would happen if you hit a bag of nuts with a baseball bat... or will we?

When you play the Game of Thrones you get a new trailer

New week I'm just changing the name of the blog to TrailerDinosaur, because that seem to be all I'm showing these days. Wait, I just checked the domain name is taken. I assume it's former NBA star Robert "Tractor" Traylor's adviceblog on raising and training dinosaurs. Which is weird because he spells his last name differently. Oh well, I'm too busy to investigate any further.

BTW, damn you HBO and your 20 dollars a month fee. This looks awesome.

Another Mass Effect 3 trailer

Holy crap, will this game just come out already? This is like Battlefield 3 all over again. I swear Bioware finished the game a year ago and has spent the last 12 months just coming up with new trailers.

Friday, March 2, 2012

These are the Links you're looking for

Batman Year One: Staring Clint Eastwood. This is another one of those excerpts from Tales of Development Hell like the Total Recall 2 story I posted last week. It covers not only Daren Aronfsky's Batman Year One pitch but all the other Batman movies that never were. Spoiler.. Madonna almost played Harley Quinn.

You can buy an entire house at Ikea now. I would totally buy an Ikea house. I love putting together furniture from Ikea, a house would be awesome. I even have my own allen wrench set.

6 reasons the Empire is better than the Old Republic. The more I think about it the author seems right, the Empire was kinda cool while the Old Republic were stupid. I mean say you live on Dantoine, what's the emperor got to do with you? It's not like he was sending Jedi's all up in your business all the time, with their creepy robes and hand gestures.

The FilmDrunk interview with Jason Mewes. I found it interesting that none of his lines in Clerks were ad-libs. They were things he had really said at one point in time, but they were all in the script. The more you know.

Hot Tub Boat. Call it a tub-job.

Heroes in a stop motion half shell

Is it just me or does it seem like it's been a youtube heavy week? Well here's another one. This is a pretty amazing recreation of the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles tv show intro all done with stop motion animation.

Way way back in the day my friend Jimmy Kim and I made a couple of stop motion mini movies using GI Joe figures. I actually used one of them for a history project, it had something to do with Native Americans attacking a fort in Oregon. I got a C.

Thursday, March 1, 2012

You, Who have Summoned me..

This is hilarious. I literally LOLed.

Kate Upton eats a royal with cheese

Even though he's trying to hide it by not coming into work today, it's Mike's Birthday. As a gift here's a video of Kate Upton eating a burger very sexy like, which really is the only proper way to eat a burger. I don't want to tell you how many times I've not gone to McDonalds because I forgot my high heeled shoes...

.. I've said too much.


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