Tuesday, December 28, 2010

Your snowman sucked...

...because it wasn't anywhere near as awesome as this SnowR2-D2. I mean look at this thing, it's gotta be 6 feet tall. If you could rig it to shoot a lightsaber out it's dome Id marry the thing (I have no idea what that means).

3D in 3D.. in 3d

I'm going to wait for it to come out on DVD.

Chewbacca hates shoveling snow

Friday, December 24, 2010

A very Zombie Holiday

Thursday, December 23, 2010

Jingle links all the way

32 Quotes to troll Geeks. 32 of these seemed a bit much, but there's at least 10 good ones.

How Different age groups celebrate Christmas. This is so true, having a kid this time of year is awesome sauce.

This issue a member of the Fantastic 4 dies. I'm guessing it's HERBIE.

Cleveland is more fun in the Offseason

What you see above is a real picture of Progressive Field (home of the Cleveland Indians) as it currently stands, a bad ass snow park!

"As part of what the team calls Snow Days, the site’s centerpieces are a 10-lane tubing hill named the batterhorn that stretches from the middle of the bleachers into right field, and a quarter-mile ice skating track called the frozen mile — the first of its kind in the United States, the Indians say — that zips past the warning track, second base, the bullpens and underneath the bleachers."

via the NYTimes

Now maybe all this Christmas spirit (ie egg nog) is clouding my judgment, but that sounds awesome! I love sledding but hate driving like 3 hours up into the mountains to go do it. I like the idea of sledding across the street from like four starbucks and possibly a strip club. Who am I kidding, it's Cleveland. There's probably four strip clubs and one starbucks.

Wednesday, December 22, 2010

More like Footbrawl.. amirite?

If the Lingerie football league is going to gain some respectability they're going to have to do something about the fighting. Like maybe institue a penalty box... or a jello pit.


btw, is that head coach Busta Rhymes?

Alf hates black people

Hey kids remember way back in the late 90s when everyone was downloading that Thundercats video where Lion-o and Panthra were swearing? This is kind of like that, except with Alf.. and more racism.

Tuesday, December 21, 2010

The Community Avengers

Here's a picture of the cast of Community drawn as the Avengers. There's not a whole lot more to add... umm, did you see the Christmas Special? ... I thought it was alright, I mean it was no paintball or blanket fort episode.

via Chris Schweizer's blog

Create your own video game character

To be fair to Video Game art designers this is pretty much the same flow chart for creating comic book characters.

Monday, December 20, 2010

That's not how you drive in the snow

Even for a random blog like this, this is pretty random. Here's a bunch of idiots that don't know how to drive in the snow. Isn't property damage hilarious!?

Now that's how you sell a car

Now I don't hate the French as much as some americans, but before today I sure as hell wasn't buying a car from them. After today? Well I'm still probably not buying a Renault, but I do appreciate their advertising a bit more.

The 7 best Christmas presents I ever received as a kid

Robotix

Robotix are a criminally underrated toy from the 80s. My parents got me the big set which came with like 5 motors, a huge battery pack and the switch pad you see above. You could make all kinds of crazy toy eating robots with one of these.

GI Joe Killer WHALE

If you really wanted to get the most out of your Joes you needs some kind of huge vehicle or playset. The one I had was the Killer WHALE, it held something like 9 figures, and had all kinds of cool moving pieces. The only thing I hate about it now is that if you want to buy one now it's like 200 dollars on ebay.

Zaxxon

Kids these days don't know how lucky they are with their DSIs and Sega Game Gears (they still make those right?). Back in the day this Zaxxon table top arcade game was the coolest thing in portable gaming. It had an LED display that was pretty craptastic but was still a huge upgrade from those black and white tiger electric handhelds that were everywhere in the 80s.

A-Team Rough Riders

Sometimes a simple toy is the best toy. Rough Riders were little cars that ran on a single AA battery. Most had two exciting modes of action, forwards and stop. The real fancy ones like the A-team set I received had a reverse. The best part about Rough Riders is that with them anything from a bathroom floor to a kitchen table became a sweet rally course.

Bard's Tale III

Ok so technically speaking I bought Bard's Tale III myself at a Babbages in Joplin Missouri, but I did it with Christmas money so it totally counts. The thing that was so memorable was that I bought it while I was on Christmas vacation 2000 miles away from my beloved Apple II. By the time I actually got to play the game I had memorized the instructions and the map front to back.

TI-99

Again not technically a gift for me, this was a gift for the entire family. The TI-99 was my Dad's last grasp at staying ahead of the technology curve. It was pretty much all blinking 12:00s on the VCR from this point on.

As far as I can remember my dad never rocked a yellow headband but I'm positive I had that pink sweater.

Lego Space Buggy

This was the most elaborate Lego set my parents ever bought for me. I remember that it felt like it took weeks to put together right, which probably meant it took like 20 minutes. This space buggy set became the base for all my Star Wars and Star Trek lego adventures.

I can't believe how spoiled kids are these days with all the officially licensed stuff Lego makes. I think I'm going to teach my kid some kind of crappy lesson by making him watch me play with his new Lego AT-AT.

Sunday, December 19, 2010

Fox Trot's all right

Friday, December 17, 2010

Nick Cage would've been the greatest Superman In the history of ever

So as anyone that goes to a comic book shop weekly can tell you, Nic Cage was almost Superman. Back in the early 'aughts Tim Burton was signed on to make a Superman movie written by Kevin Smith with Cage as the star. The above video is a test run at the suit our beloved Mr Cage would have rocked.

Most net nerds are claiming that the above video is proof that Superman Returns could've been way worse. I think they're all wrong. Superman Returns was boooooring, (in fact it's the one superhero movie my wife absolutely refuses to watch a second time) but it could have been super awesomely bad. I mean which would you rather see, Brandon Routh's sulking emo Superman or Nic Cage's sparkly figure skating Superman dressed in a bear suit running around punching ladies yelling about bees? As usual, I vote bees.

Thursday, December 16, 2010

Han definitely shot first

I'm not sure what Lucasarts was thinking when they put Han killing Chewie in the new Force Unleashed video game. They're probably smoking the same weed everyone in Leavenworth is smoking.

Wednesday, December 15, 2010

Leavenworth in the heezy

Here's a tourism video from the sleepy Bavarian town of Leavenworth. It involves a rapping nutcracker, dancing beer maidens and the phrase "juicy like a brawt". I'm not sure what any of it means, but I can tell you this. They must have fantastic weed in Leavenworth.

Tuesday, December 14, 2010

X-Box Live Player Alignment Chart

Turns out I'm Chaotic Neutral, which is funny because I almost never wear hats.

via Dorkly

Zombie Linkaroo

The Walking Dead Nominated for a Golden Globe. Suck it haters.


Zombie Survival Riverboat. Great idea until the zombies learn to swim.


Zombie facts and information. This just in; zombie nurses have a terrible bedside manner.

Monday, December 13, 2010

69 seconds of zombies getting jacked up

Here you go, every zombie death in the first season of The Walking Dead. I was going to make a self deprecating joke here but my wife is sitting over my shoulder really pushing for a sex joke. 69... teeheehee

Mass Effect 3 Trailer

Holy ass, this looks awesome. Of course it reminds me that I never played Mass Effect 2. Maybe I can pick it up used at Gamestop for cheap. Then by the time I finish it Mass Effect 4 will be out and I can get 3 for cheap. Oh who am I kidding? Battlefield 2 has the keys to my soul.

Lego Black Ops

While not 100 percent true to the game, I feel like this video captures the spirit of playing Call of Duty: Black Ops on-line. Especially when that one freaking camper is hiding behind the door. ARGH I hate that!

Old Thor Trailer is new again

So this weekend the new Thor trailer dropped. It's essentially the same thing we saw at SDCC, with a couple more lighting effects thrown into the mix. It still looks great, especially when you compare it to the goofy mess of the Green Lantern trailer.

Friday, December 10, 2010

Dog Fort!

Did you know they're working on a Top Gun sequel? Is it to much to ask for that it stars Lobster Dog?

Live Action Ninja Turtles

This is easily the nerdiest thing you'll see today. Unless you're coming over later to play Call of Duty. I'm running by the comic book shop this afternoon so we'll have plenty to read!

Thursday, December 9, 2010

Hugh Jackman, still boxing that robot

I can't believe this is a real movie. That being said, I totally want to see it.

Transformers 3 trailer

Ok, this doesn't actually look that bad. Probably because America's space program kicked ass in the 60s, seriously what happened to us America? We used to go to the moon, now all we do is repair the Hubble every couple months. You changed..

.. btw, how deep is that robot's eye socket? Has Michael Bay ever seen a camera lens? I don't remember my camcorder having that many gears.

Wednesday, December 8, 2010

Awwwwww

Here's a kid trying to drink from a hose. something something something spider-man.

Justice League Movie News

No you're not looking at the cast of some fan made JLA movie, it's another superhero porno. I swear there's more superhero porn movie news than actual superhero movie news these days.

For this go round the porno guys are taking on the entire JLA. I guess they decided that Aquaman or Green Lantern weren't popular enough to support their own parody. Of course the obvious down side to doing a JLA movie like this is that there are way more dudes than chicks in the JLA. I mean really if you only have one girl what's the difference between this and the 2 Wonder Woman pornos they've already announced?

Bleeding Cool has more pictures, they're mostly safe for work. mostly..

Tuesday, December 7, 2010

All right Nerds, you've gone too far

Absolutely nothing good can happen once you start blurring the lines between C3-PO and sexy time.

via the daily what

Katy Perry on the Simpsons

Fox turned into a hardcore sex channel so gradually, I didn't even notice.

Friday, December 3, 2010

Nazi Dinosaurs FTW

So here's a trailer for Dino D-Day. I'm sure when it comes out all my friends will tell me I have to buy it and then after I do they'll stop playing it cause it's 'gay'. I swear to you guys I have no money, you're ruining Christmas!

Thursday, December 2, 2010

2 Minutes from Star Blazers

Argh! Why did I take Spanish in high school instead of Japanese? You know how many times I've been to mexico? Once, and everyone there spoke english. No one was impressed that I knew how to ask for directions to the shoe store.

Not the Bees!

I was about to post a video of a high school football player who after scoring a touchdown gets an unsportsmanlike penalty because he took a knee and pointed to God, but come on did you see all those bees?

I swear every time I see a bee in my house I think this is happening to me. I'll listen to the walls trying to find the hive and everything. Of course the only thing I ever hear is my evil twin locked in the attic. Quiet up there Hugo, I'm trying to play call of duty!

Wednesday, December 1, 2010

What the hell is going on with the Walking Dead?


So I'm reading an article over at io9.com about how much the last episode of The Walking Dead the TV show deviates from the Walking Dead the comic book. It was a good read, full of nerdy hand wringing (the comment section was full of helpful suggestions on how they were screwing everything up). It's been a couple years since I read the first few TPBs so honestly I couldn't remember a lot of specifics on how the show was different.

Then I load back up the front page, look for some new articles and see a report that Frank Darabont has fired the entire writing staff for The Walking Dead. Presumably to hire some of the commenters from the previous article.

Now I'm not ready to hit the panic button just yet but this does seem like some interesting news. Conventional wisdom would say that having a dedicated writing staff could help keep each episode consistant with the last (and the comic), something you know nerds like me care about. However, maybe the 70+ issues of the comic already provides for some consistancy. I can't imagine any freelance writer is going to try and invent the wheel in a single episode. Plus you still have Durabont at the helm.

I know the show seems to have veered away from the comic quite a bit in the last couple episodes but you have to keep in mind that when the season shot they only were given 6 episodes by AMC. That wasn't a huge vote of confidence. In an article on the show in last weeks EW Durabont said that he wanted to make sure that this season didn't end in a typical TV season ending cliffhanger. I assume that decision was made because they wanted to make sure the 6 episodes would stand on their own as a story.

I'm still high on the show, let the nerdier nerds than I complain about the shows direction. I'm just here for the zombies.

Monday, November 29, 2010

Game of Thrones teaser

So I know nothing about the book Game of Thrones other than it's long and that my friend Mike says it's awesome. The trailer looks pretty awesome, but it's on HBO so either I'm going to have to wait until it hit netflix or find some way of downloading it illegally. Of course I'm not even sure if you can do that on the internet. Will napster let me do it?

Tryptophan induced links

Spider-Man musical finally opens. Spoiler Alert! It was awful.

The epic scam behind Cowboys and Aliens. This is a good read about a guy determined to get his movie proposal attention, even if it meant giving it away as a comic. I'm shocked more movie studios don't try this.

Irvin Kershner dead at 87. Is it a coincidence that Spike just showed the re-edited Empire Strikes back this weekend? Yeah, it probably was.

Wednesday, November 24, 2010

The Community Alignment chart

Here's your Dungeons and Dragon's style alignment chart for the show Community. It's so nerdy your glasses just broke and taped themselves while you were reading it.

Monday, November 22, 2010

Wonder Woman Movie News

So it's official, soon there's going to be two Wonder Woman porn movies and zero regular Wonder Woman movies. Way to go Hollywood! I guess we should be happy she might be getting a TV show, I mean Superheroes on TV work way better than in movies. Have you see the new trailers for The Cape? It's going to make Heroes look like House Party 2.

I guess what I'm trying to say here is that Warner Brothers with your indecision to really pull the trigger on a Wonder Woman movie, you just got played out.

Random Nerdy Comics

I'm busy today so here's some random comics I've saved to my random comics folder. Now if you'll excuse me I have to go think about Call of Duty some more.





Friday, November 19, 2010

Sexy Time Kinect Time

So here's Adult Star (aren't most Stars adults?) Kristen Price figuring out if the Kinect will recognize nudity. Overall the clip is a bit too G4 for my tastes (ie pandering to slobbery nerds), but it is interesting to see how the Kinect recognizes things like bear suits and loose clothing. Oh yeah plus there's boobs.

Thursday, November 18, 2010

This is why I don't post anymore


This is a weapons damage chart for Call of Duty Black Ops that some beautiful nerd made this week. Right now it's the 3rd most important thing in my life right after Jesus and my son... I mean 4th most important thing. Sorry honey, love you!

Wednesday, November 17, 2010

Goal of the Weak

It's been awhile since I've featured any bad soccer. Here's a guy for some third world country (Qatar I think?) missing the easiest goal ever.

btw... nice dummy from the goalie, you don't see goalies try that enough.

Green Lantern Trailer

When I first started to show this to my wife she said "eww... can you believe they got Seth Rogan to play the Green Lantern?"

God bless her.

Monday, November 15, 2010

If War was like Call of Duty

You'll excuse me if I don't post much, this is totally my life now.

Friday, November 12, 2010

Battle for Los Angeles trailer

The battle for Los Angeles is one of my favorite Rage against the Machine Albums, It looks like someone finally decided to make a movie inspired by it. What do you mean? It's not inspired by the album? Oh well the aliens look pretty cool.

Thursday, November 11, 2010

The low hurdles are the toughest

Here's a girl running the hurdles. I don't want to give the whole thing away, but the results are hilarious.

Wednesday, November 10, 2010

The end?

My place of work is changing their internet policy, oh noes! What will become of this blog?

Where's my Darth Vader app?

So apparently in Japan you can download an app that gives you your own private Darth Vader, that no one else can see. Just one more thing AT&T has dropped the ball on over here.

Tuesday, November 9, 2010

The post where a blogger complains

today I feel like I'm a puppy and the world is a fat baby.

Hey, it's more Tron!

I'm running out of things to blog about. Here's a new Tron trailer, if anything I guess this saves you from having to watch it premiere on No Ordinary Family.

Now that I think about it you totally owe me. big time.

Monday, November 8, 2010

The Walking Dead


So enough people have asked me what I thought about The Walking Dead that I figured if I did a blog post about it I might save my self some real life conversations.

It's awesome. It's really awesome. And not just in a Kevin loves zombies kinda way, it's awesome in a this show is groundbreaking TV kinda way. The first couple episodes of The Walking Dead to me are very reminiscent of the first few episodes of Lost or Homicide: Life on the Streets. You could tell that everyone involved is just working on a whole different level, from the directors and producers to the writers and actors. We're 2 episodes in and I already feel like it's the best show on TV. Sorry the best show on tv not staring Charlie Sheen. I mean that guy really has a gift.

Friday, November 5, 2010

Friday Night Links

Faces of the Last Season of Oprah. If this doesn't make you laugh it will at least put a smile on your face.


10 Nerd Properties that should get Porn Parodies. Not enough Greatest American Hero on this list.


9 Former Players that would make the NBA better. Not enough Shawn Kemp on this list.

Most Expensive Richard Marx song ever!

don't worry this will be related, just trust me.

So here's a story intended to scare you out of downloading the latest Eminem cd (if his violent lyrics don't scare you away already ((sissy))).
"Jammie Thomas-Rasset, the Minnesota mother of four who has fought the RIAA for the past four years over 24 songs that she illegally downloaded and shared over P2P network Kazaa and has become something of a high-profile figure due to her refusal to settle, was handed a stiff verdict on Wednesday: A jury ruled that Thomas-Rasset should pay Capitol Records $1.5 million for those 24 songs, breaking down to damages of $62,500 a song."

geekosystem

What song could possibly be worth 62,500 dollars? How about Cryin by Aerosmith, Iris by the Goo Goo dolls or Now and Forever by Richard Marx (who to his credit said he was ashamed to be associated with the lawsuit). In related news, Richard Marx is still alive!

This is pretty much the reason I'm scared to download anything. It's not just songs these days either. The guy that made that ridiculous Batman Porno is suing a bunch of people that torrented it. That's pretty much the sign that the anit-pirating crusade has gone to far. First our free music, then our free porn, what's next is Visa going to sue me over all the credit cards I've been stealing? It's not like I was going to buy them anyway, it's a victimless crime!

Beyond Black Mesa

I think I posted something about this a couple years ago (yeah that's right, this blog is 2 years old). A small group of dedicated nerds are making a Half Life fan movie, an AWESOME fan movie. This is the official trailer.

I'll be honest with you, this looks better than any sci-fi action movie I've seen in years. I'd pay 100 dollars to see this before paying 50 cents to see Transformers 3. I mean in theory I would. I'll probably just torrent both but it's the thought that counts, right?

Thursday, November 4, 2010

Sucker Punch; the Tralier

The nerds over at Topless Robot have described Sucker Punch as "Things the Internet Likes; The Movie". It's hard to come up with anything more to say about this. I mean, it almost seems like it's too much. Robots, Chicks with swords, Drgagons, Samurais and Vanessa Hudgens? It almost feels like the cinematic equivalent to the day after you eat all your son's Halloween candy.

Sean Duffy Brought that Axe to Washington

So Sean from the Real Wold Boston was ellected to congress the other night. In related news I feel about a hundred years old. Seriously, the Seattle season was taped over 11 years ago. I think that makes it older than Justin Beiber, whoever he is.

Wednesday, November 3, 2010

That Duck really knows how to Dance

I totally could have used that Duck's dancing skills this last weekend.

omg, omg, omg.. it's Leo!

The fine folks over at Film Drunk are passing along news that Leonardo DiCaprio has signed on to play HH Holmes in a film adaption of The Devil in the White City, which is one of my FAVORITE books. So favorite that describing it really did require the caps lock.

If you've never heard of HH Holmes before consider yourself lucky, he probably would have killed you. The dude built an entire hotel with the expressed purpose of luring in young women drawn to the Chicago worlds fair and killing them. It had secret rooms, purposely dark hallways and a hidden crematory in the basement so he could burn the flesh off his victims bodies and sell their skeletons to the local University. It's like he was Jigsaw but he also charged you rent.

Monday, November 1, 2010

Nerdy signs at the Rally to Restore Sanity

I don't know how much sanity was restored at the Daily Show rally this last weekend, but I can tell you the protesters brought the funny when it came the their signs. I'd have a lot more respect for the teaparty nut jobs if they'd just have some better signs. I mean anyone can put a Hitler moustache on Obama, but moonite/terrorism jokes are precious like diamonds. or babies. or diamond babies







check out a whole bunch more at buzzfeed.
 

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