Nintendo 64 Rap! Back To The 90's!

I'm so far behind on posts for the month it's silly. I don't know what happened. Usually I fall behind when I go on vacation but I think I took all of one day off this month. Maybe it's because I haven't been feeling good. Yesterday I slept for 10 hours and still woke up exhausted. I think I have Sars. Basically what I'm getting at is HERE COME THE UNVETTED YOUTUBE VIDEOS.

I haven't actually listened to this yet, It's probably corny as hell. When it comes to white people rapping about Nintendo games my standards are INCREDIBLY HIGH. Still it gives me a second to complain about how expensive old games are. I remember when you could go to a video game store and buy used NES cartridges for one or two bucks. You know how much the average SNES cart goes for these days? $19.99. I bought Bayonetta 2 on the WiiU for less than that just a week ago. The secondary market for old games has gotten out of control. Heaven forbid you're looking for something cool like Super Metroid or Conker's Bad Fur day. Be prepared to pay $40 my friend.

At this point its hard for me to feel too guilty for downloading a bunch of ROMS and building a RetroPie. Playing older games is a lot of fun but man that novelty wears off really quickly. I fired up WCW/NWO Revenge the other day and it was great, for like 20 minutes. Haven't played it since. No way I'm spending new game money on an old game I'll play once every 6 months.

New Iron Fist Trailer

Hot off the success of the Fantastic Four this weekend Marvel has released the trailer for Iron Fist. It has a lot more rapping in it that I would have imagined.

Listener: I don't Want to Live Forever

Hey kiddos, it's Friday and it's hot as balls out. Last night when I went to bed it was 80 degrees inside the house. When I woke up this morning it was 75. That's gonna make for a great weekend. Anyway, enjoy this live performance of Listener's I Don't Want to Live Forever. It's a rad song with an awesome/manic performance by Dan Smith.

They're Gathering Again

It's time for the most anticipated infomercial of the year. The annual Gathering of the Juggalos video. This year's video comes to us from the FUTURE. A future where I assume cool things like the ICP and Faygo have been outlawed so it's up to one intrepid group of ninjas to travel back in time to the 2015 Gathering of the Juggalos and I don't know... save the future Faygo? This thing is 20 minutes long I didn't have time to watch it all this morning.

I think I say this every year, but man I really want to go to this thing. Think of how awesome the people (?) watching must be. Sure there's a 50/50 chance I never make it back but Anybody Killa and Nova Rockafeller are going to be there. I'm pretty sure it's worth taking the chance.

I do declare 2014 the year of the giant ass

Hey kids, remember Jennifer Lopez? Here's her new video Booty ft Iggy Azelea. More specifically Iggy Azelea's giant fake ass and by featuring I mean rubbing up and down on J-Lo's big ol booty. This right here is what you would call capturing the Zeitgeist. Traditional pop music is barren of ideas and the big labels are so desperate that you pay attention to them that they're reduced to producing music videos that look like the first 5 minutes of a porno. Sure it's a really nice porno with good production values but still...

Music is in a weird spot right now. You have Apple paying U2 $100 million to give away an album to all iTunes subscribers just to promote their new phone. Last year Macklemore dominated the charts as an "indie artist" but to do so he had to pay Sony execs a boat load of cash to get his songs on the radio. Nobody is buying CDs, even on iTunes. Younger listeners are moving to subscriber based listening like Pandora and Spotify. Terrestrial radio has been reduced to this weird dj-less automatic jukebox format where most stations only play the same 10 big label approved pop songs on loop.

I guess through all of that one thing remains a constant. Sex sells. Doesn't matter if it's Madonna in a pointy bra, Katy Perry dressed up as a sexy smurf or Iggy Azelea putting on a tijuana donkey show.

This generation desperately needs a Nirvana (and that's coming from someone that HATES Nirvana).

Now that's how you sell plants

Peaceful Belly Farm in Haily Idaho is having a sale this weekend and wooo-doggy do they know how to advertise it. If I already hadn't spend a hundred bucks on a bunch of plants for around the house last month I'd definitely be there*.




* I definitely wouldn't be there

Former Fat Boys: It's Morphin' Time

I've very excited that this video by the Former Fat Boys has gotten a bit of net buzz lately. Their last album The Legend of Hard Corey is one of my favorite albums of the last couple years. The video is pretty rad, it's got awful looking ninja fights, cheezy special effects and the white ranger may or may not motorboat the pink ranger at one point. I'm not 100% sure why it had to be nine minutes long, but whatever. What was I going to do with those minutes anyway?

The mc chris Cartoon Pitch

Like a year ago irascible nerdcore rapper mc chris pitched a cartoon to Cartoon Network to a rousing chorus of nos. He then did a kickstarter to produce the cartoon himself. What he ended up with is this 6 minute pitch that I think is pretty hilarious. Of course I'm a big fan of robot owls and wild west Mars so your mileage may vary.

Kid Apocalypse: Came from the Chain

I unknowingly featured Kid Apocalypse earlier in the week in one of my Emerald City Comic-Con cosplay posts (last one should be up this weekend). I had no idea he was spitting mad rhymes and recording a music video at the con. It reminds me a lot of the Wordburglar video Drawings with Words.

Bacon Pancakes

I don't want to go out on a limb here but this mashup of Jake from Adventure time singing about bacon pancakes and Jay-Z's New York State of mind might just be the greatest East Coat Hip-Hop slash Adventure Time mash up of all time.

Sorry LL

Train Simulator: Swag Overload

10 seconds in to this music video for Train Simulator and I was LOLing all over the placed. I LOLed so hard I swear I had to change my LOLs from all the LOLing.

What I'm trying to say is that this is funny. And it sort of makes me want to check out Train Simulator. Good job internet.

Tampa Bay Cheerleaders Style

Still not old.

Solo Gangnam Style

Still not old.

Oregon Duck Gangnam Style?

So this Oregon parody of the PSY video Gangnam Style will get taken down for copyright violations. Let's see how long it stays up.

Kent West Hill Style

Gangnam Style, Dissected. I swear I spent 2 hours this morning listening to K-pop on youtube while I contemplated quitting my job. Anyhoo, here's PSY's amazeballs video Gangnam Style. After you're done watching it and you've changed your shorts, go read The Atlantic's breakdown so you'll know what it all meant.

Also, Korean Ben at the 1:55 mark.

Why Do Some People Think Neil Armstrong Never Walked On The Moon. Right now, I can watch an entire season of My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic on my freaking cell phone. How can anyone doubt we don't have the technology to get to the moon? How do you think they get My Little Pony on my phone in the first place? It comes from the moon, duh.

What would happen if everyone on earth stood as close to each other as they could and jumped. I don't want to ruin the surprise ending, so I'll just say the surprise ending is fantastic.

How To Prepare Your Car To Handle An EMP And Why You Shouldn’t Bother. Hold on a second cowboy, are you trying to tell me that Movies and TV have been lying to me about the power of an EMP? Have I been driving around in a 1978 Chevy Nova wrapped in tinfoil for nothing?!

Alison Brie spits mad flow

Community's Alison Brie has a lot of things going for her. She funny, attractive, busty, however she's not a very good rapper. Of course that doesn't stop her from trying.

BTW, what the heck does double werewolf even mean?

Gather up your Juggalos

Yesterday if you had told me that this morning I would watch (in it's entirety) a 20 minute commercial for the 2012 Gathering of the Juggalos and be totally sold on the event, I would have called you a dirty dirty liar from whore island. But here we are...
Seriously, I'm not even typing in an ironic hipster tone here. This sounds awesome. From Kool Keith to Bobcat Goldthwait to Colt Cabana vs Vampiro to Violent J's Beach Boys BBQ Blowout! Bash! Blast! this thing has it all. Who wants to head out to Cave Rock, IL in mid August?

Kirby Krackle: Live in Seattle

Yesterday Seattle's own Kirby Krackle released an album titled Live in Seattle. It's awesome and you should really go download it. Like Right now. Go ahead I'll wait..

Ok, At the very least you should hit play on the above youtube clip. If after watching them perform Roll Over with Adam WarRock you still don't want to download the album then you can tell me why you don't like nice things and we can re-examine what our friendship is based on.

Again, this is why I don't really review things.

Tasty Face by mc chris is the song of my summer

I know, I know, I've been posting a lot of songs lately. Well tough tooties, This zombie themed cover of Call me Maybe by mc chris is amazeballs. If you can't enjoy a song about doing bath salts and eating people's faces, especially one that helps raise money for cancer, than you're the one with the problem not me.

Have you tried turning it off and on again?

Sorry, I guess for a couple days there I forgot I even had a blog. As an apology here’s a couple “rappers” covering the theme song to The IT Crowd. Man, I love that show. And this cover is pretty good, as long as you ignore the one rapper in the middle who sucks.

If I had to do an impromptu ranking of my favorite british TV shows it would go like this:

Red Dwarf
The IT Crowd
Doctor Who
Top Gear
Ummm Luthor maybe?

I guess this is why I don’t do a whole lot of lists. I don’t really watch a lot of British TV shows, I’ve heard that Sherlock show is really good. Does Downton Abbey count? I don’t really watch that either.