GTA V: the "official" trailer

Yesterday saw the premier of the official Grand Theft Auto V trailer. It doesn't really show off anymore than all the other videos Rockstar has released but it's a nice reminder of how you'll be spending your September.

... The Blurst of Times: Heroes of Cosplay

Being caught in the dregs of summertime TV scheduling has provided me with ample opportunities to explore the depths the fringe cable networks summer programing. With "..the Blurst of Times" I'll tell you all about whatever horrible reality show I watched the night before (or in this case earlier in the week).

Heroes of Cosplay follows a handful of cosplayers as they compete in major comic book and sci-fi convention costume contests around the country (who knows, maybe the world I've only seen two episodes). I'm kind of surprised it's taken this long for someone to put together a show on cosplayers or convention goers. Comic book conventions have never been hotter and you can't surf the geekier side of the web without running into a half dozen different cosplay slideshows.

I'll admit, I got sucked into this show because the first episode I saw took place at this year's Emerald City Comic Con. I thought maybe I'd see myself in some background footage. It might sound crazy, but half my face was caught in a photo gallery for the Seattle PI so weirder things have happened.

The show is pretty standard reality TV fare. Each episode follows a few cosplayers that are headed to a big convention, with the intention of competing in a costume contest. We get to see them work on their costumes and some behind the scenes drama over the competition itself. I've seen two episodes and it looked like each episode followed a slightly different group of people. Understandable considering some of the bigger conventions are only a week or two apart. I was a bit surprised as to how much drama there was in the cosplay scene. Everyone's really competitive and some people are seen as "real serious cosplayers" and others not so much.

Or are they? An artist I follow on twitter familiar with all the stars of the show made the comment that he recognized all the faces but it was like they were being worn by different people. Also I noticed that one of the cosplayers won a contest with a costume they had worn to Comic-Con back in 2012. The show made it look like she was frantically working on the costume to get it ready for Mega Con. Curious about this, I looked her up on twitter and she mentioned that she has lots of costumes and while she had worn it before she had never competed in it.

In the end it's not really a big deal, but it made me question exactly how much reality was in this reality show

On a scale of hipster guy dressed up as Slave Leia to this crazy rad Hawkgirl, I'll give Heroes of Cosplay a B+. I wish it wasn't edited so heavily but it's still really enjoyable.

Dunked on/She Got Dunked On, duouble feature

Have I posted this before? I have right? It's only the greatest thing to happen to rap music and basketball ever. Seriously I can't watch this enough. If only youtube was a thing when I was 17. Oh man the Bitter Lake dunk hoops mix tape we could have put together...

This follow up video isn't as good (because that would be impossible) but it's still not bad. They loose big time points with me for no Peyton and Kemp jerseys at the end.

Battlefield Friends: Girl Gamer

I've spent enough time on Xbox live to attest that this is a pretty accurate portrayal of a girl joining an on-line match. Even guys that mean well start slobbering all over them and become total fools. It's awful enough to drive me out of most matches. In fact if I had to rank the most annoying Xbox gamers I'd rank them thus:

Guys that play music in the background

Guys that eat while on the mic

kids calling everyone fags

dudes that can't stop slobbering over girls

anyone using the n-word

So there's your lesson for the day. Single guys, don't be that guy. You're not going to meet a girl playing Halo, just enjoy the game.

Tony Jaa MJ Style

Here's Tony Jaa fighting some guy while wearing a hat and dancing like Michael Jackson. It's really the most Tony Jaa thing ever.

I take that back the most Tony Jaa thing ever would be if he was doing this on the back of an elephant. Get to work on that Tony.

It was always dysentery

This picture is relevant to many of my interests.

Sink these Links

Ben Affleck is Batman. I'm not sure why I led with this. I have very little opinion on the matter. Sure I think it's amusing that the guy that played O'bannion in Dazed and Confused is Batman but that's about it.

I do think it's hilarious that the best DC/Warner Bros can do to fight Marvel and their complete box office domination is to put the only two successful film characters they've ever had into one movie. Meanwhile Marvel is about to spend 100+ million dollars on a movie that stars a tree and a talking raccooon. And it will probably be a HUGE hit.

Bradley Cooper might be Rocket Raccoon. Speaking of which, oscar nominee Bradley Cooper might be playing said talking raccoon. Makes sense to me.

MASSIVE Louisiana Sinkhole Devours Whole Trees in Seconds Flat. Damn nature you scary! Oh this wasn't nature? It was drilling gone wrong? Let me know when Kaiju start pouring through, please. I'll start working on a Jaeger out of these spare Ikea parts I have laying around.

Star Wars Episode VII will be shot on film. I'd like to think that when George Lucas read this his jowels got real wobbly and he shouted "but I delcared film dead 14 years ago!" Then he tried to take his toys back and some nameless suit at Disney kicked him in the nuts.

Now that's an opening pitch

South Korean taekwondoist/actress Tae-Mi's first pitch at what I'm assuming is a Korean league baseball game is really a sight to see. I think it's a balk, but whatever. In a world where Carly Rae Jepsen doesn't even know what direction home plate is, this is criss-cross applesauce.

The Mariners should at least think about signing here to a minor league deal.

New Destiny Developer Diary is drool worthy

I'm at work right now so I can't actually hear anything anyone is saying in this video but holy shitsnacks this game looks crazy good. It's like Halo but with all the things I like from other FPSs like Borderlands and Battlefield. And the graphics... oh man. If this thing doesn't move a few next generation consoles nothing will.

I Think he knows what he's talking about

I post too many youtube clips so I thought I'd start posting more cartoons I've boosted from reddit. IS THAT COOL WITH EVERYONE?

Build that Iron Man armor son

Here's Nick Selby, a sophomore at Georgia Tech welcoming incoming freshman to Georgia Tech. It might be the greatest speech I've ever heard. I swear after listening to it I was totes motivated for like a good 5 minutes.

Man those 5 minutes were really productive.

I owned your mom.

Ghost Shark!

Syfy really is going to keep beating that dead horse shark, aren't they? Here's the trailer for their latest shlockfest. It's a bit more understated that say Sharknado but it still looks like it might be good for a few laughs.

JJ Abrams mystery project?

Apparently JJ Abrams newest mystery project is a youtube clip titled Stranger about a guy that washes up on a beach only to meat a super freaky guy holding a torch with his mouth sewn shut. I liked it but it could have used more lens flare.

The Bureau: X-Com Declassified, the launch trailer

I've mentioned it a few times on here before but I enjoyed the crap out of X-Com: Enemy Unknown. I'm not sure yet if I will pick up this quasi sequel (apparently the game mechanics are WAY different) but I'll give it a good look. Maybe I'll pick it up on Steam during Christmas or something. I'm a big sucker for aliens in the past kind of storylines, so this is right up my alley.

Or I'll just get COD: Ghosts and prestige my life away.

Watch out ESPN, here comes Fox Sports 1

Looks like who ever is in charge of hiring all the leggy blondes at Fox News was also put in charge of hiring leggy blondes for the new Fox Sports 1. Which is a thing launching this weekend. Don't check your cable provider, it's probably not available yet and really there's nothing to watch on there right now anyway.

However, don't count these plucky young ladies out just yet. ESPN is ripe for a take down. Even the most brain-dead casual sports fan is tired of 24 hr Lebron/Tebow watches and HOT TAKES where two guys yell at each other for an hour. Don't even get me started on Stuart Scott's booyahs.

So I for one welcome out new Fox Sports 1 overlords. Their coverage of sports will probably be just as fractured and awful as EPSNs but at least they've given us something nice to look at.

Grand Theft Auto Online?

I guess today is video game trailer day. Rockstar sort of blew everyone's minds today when they announced and showed off the trailer for their new Grand Theft Auto MMO. It's everything you loved about GTA III and nothing you hated about GTA IV. Plus you get to kill your friends.

Sadly this isn't just a mode built into GTA V but is a complete stand along game. However if you buy a copy of GTA V you do get some sort of on-line pass that will let you play for a few weeks. In a world where Activision and EA are showing off trailers for DLC on games that haven't even been released yet, it sounds like a pretty good deal.

Call of Duty: 39, the quest for more money

I'm not going to lie to you, this trailer for Call of Duty: Ghosts has my attention. Probably not enough to actually buy the game or anything. Still, it makes me a bit wistful for all the hours I spent on Call of Duty: Black Ops.

My wife is due in just a couple weeks so conventional wisdom would say I won't have a lot of time to play video games this fall/winter, however that's not always the case. I remember playing a ton of late night Call of Duty and Battlefield 2 right after my son was born because he had a really weird sleeping/eating schedule. I've talked with some other parents who experienced the same thing. So here's hoping that little baby girl will totally wreck my sleeping schedule so I can play some games this fall/winter. I never did get around to beating Skyrim.

What if Episode II: Attack of the Clones was good?

Every once in a while I'll get into a geekument with someone over which Star Wars movie is the worst. It's one of those things that totally confuses me because I feel like Attack of the Clones isn't just the worst Star Wars movie ever made, I feel that it's one of the worst movies ever made, period. But it didn't have to be. Michael from Belated Media breaks it down for you.

I know this video is 16 minutes long and that's like a year and a half in internet time but trust me this is totally worth it. Someone hook this guy up with JJ Abrams because I want him working on the new Star Wars movie.

Seinfeld predicts 99% of all Facebook relationships

First look at Guardians of the Galaxy

Every time I see or read news regarding the Guardians of the Galaxy movie my mind is blown just a tad bit more than it already is. Seriously, it's the year 2013 and Marvel is spending MILLIONS AND MILLIONS of dollars on a Guardians of the Galaxy movie. What's next, the New Warriors? Heroes for Hire? The Great Lake Avengers? It's a post Avengers world anything can happen.

What you're looking at here is Glen Close (really?) dressed up as Nova Prime and some dude in a Nova Corps suit. I like the suit but someone mentioned that this looks like an episode of Defiance and I'm pretty sure that wasn't a compliment. I'm guessing this will look a lot better on film than in a behind the scenes paparazzi pic.

picture via gammasquad. Go check them out for more behind the scenes pics.

Also here's some leaked gifs of test footage that was shown at SDCC. You get a real nice look at Groot (I AM GROOT!) and Rocket Racoon.

The Star Wars, the comic trailer

I don't know if you know this but the first draft of Star Wars is almost nothing like the actual shooting draft. Everyone's an alien, Luke is actually called Starkiller it's really long and super bizarre. At least that's what I remember from reading a script I downloaded more than 10 years ago.

Well good news everyone! Dark Horse Comics is making a comic book "based" on that script. I use quotes because I'm almost positive it was Luke Starkiller in the script I read and here they have an Anakin Starkiller and a Luke Skywalker. Either way, it looks cool and I'll probably be checking it out.

Touring Links

An automotive unicorn - BMW 2000 tii Touring. Welp now I know what I'm going to buy if I ever win the powerball. Seriously, this is the most beautiful BMW I've ever seen. Who wants to "loan" me 20 grand?

More pictures from the new X-Men film. Someone on reddit put together a nice collection of pictures from the set of X-Men: Days of Future past. I assume that means you'll see the same collection of pictures on Buzzfeed by the end of the day.

How Marvel Unified Its Movie Universe (And Why That Won’t Be Easy for DC). This article popped up several times on my twittah machine yesterday. It's pretty good, although it paints Marvel Studio's Kevin Feige in such a positive light that I suspect it might have been written by his mother. Still, as Rob Liefeld pointed out on twitter, it's crazy to think that Iron Man 3 has made over a Billion dollars this summer while the comic book has NEVER been the number one selling comic in it's entire 50 year history.

You could probably argue that RDJ is the most important person in comics today.

What’s RIGHT and What's WRONG About the SAN DIEGO COMIC-CON. Comic-Con is annoying. It's full of things that I'm interested in but it's also marginalizing the thing I'm interested in the most. The comics! Of course that's no big surprise. Comics haven't been the focus of Comic-Con for at least 10 years. Maybe in a couple years they'll rename it to Pop-Con and we can all get over how Comic-Con has been ruined by Twilight.

Corey Feldman's "Ascension Millennium"

Did you know that Corey Feldman is a serious musician now? Sorry, but now you do. Here's the video for his new hit single Ascension Millennium. Now I haven't actually listened to this because my computer at work doesn't have speakers but I'm pretty sure it's terrible. It has to be, right?

Anyway I posted this for two reasons. First off, Sean Astin! Seriously send me anything even remotely related to the Goonies and it's going up in a heartbeat. Secondly, the part a couple minutes in when Corey spins around and almost falls down. THAT IS AWESOME, someone gif that shizz.

Pro Surfer Anastasia Ashley’s Twerk-Up

Professional surfer Anastasia Ashley has an interesting warm up routine. I believe the kids call this twerking. Back in my day we called it 40 dollars at the Lusty Lady. hey-o!

I'm not entirely sure what the benefit is in warming up like this but I'm willing to give it a try before my soccer game tomorrow.

Thor 2, trailer 2

Would you believe that Thor: The Dark World premiered their 2nd trailer this morning on youtube? I'm very close to renaming this blog 2nd Trailers.

So the new Thor trailer covers a lot of the same ground as the first one. There's a bit more Loki, a couple new shots of Asgard and more Natalie Portman making goo-goo eyes at Chris Hemsworth. I'm still pumped and jacked for this moving, Thor's easily in my top 5 favoritist comic book characters, but I'm a bit underwhelmed by the new trailer. I'm not sure what I was expecting but it wasn't more of the same.

Trailer #2 for Ender's Game

I guess this is the week to premier your second trailer, eh?

I'm still firmly on the fence over this one. So far both trailers for Ender's Game sure seem to put the emphasis on super space action and adults talking to each other. Two things that the books aren't really big on. Don't get me wrong, the action scenes look pretty cool but if you read Ender's Game and you really think its a book about space combat, you've pretty much missed the point. Something Hollywood is far to good at when it comes to classic science fiction books.

Machete Kills, now with moar speedboat

Sweet Jebus, the second trailer for Machete Kills looks good. I'm talking 3rd trailer for Pacific Rim type good.

The biggest difference between this trailer and the last is the inclusion of that gorgeous candy red speedboat. I'm really eager to see more speedboat. Movies and TV shows these days don't use speedboats enough anymore. Back my day if you had a bad ass speedboat it meant you were a bad ass. I don't know when as a society we stopped caring about speedboats, but I wouldn't be surprised if Hulk Hogan and Tropic Thunder has something to do with it.

Is that a Sentinel in your pocket or HOLY CRAP..

Sorry for the lack of posts, here's a picture of a Sentinel from the set of X-Men: Days of Future Past. We square? Cool.

... The Blurst of Times: The Bachelorette

Having my parents in town all week watching my son while his daycare is closed has provided me with ample opportunities to explore the depths of ABCs bachelor/bachelorette wheel of douche. With "..the Blurst of Times" I'll tell you all about whatever horrible reality show I watched the night before (or in this case earlier in the week).

As the screen cap from my wife's twitter feed has shown, Monday night the internet was absolutely ON BUZZ with the huge twist in the first part of the two part Bachelorette finale. Are you familiar with the Bachelor and the Bachelorette? Of course you are, so I'll skip a lot of the pomp and circumstance. The big shocker came when the Bachelorette (I forget her name, lets call her Sally) was down to the final 3 guys (lets call them the final 3 guys). Sally had just decided she fake loved one more than the other two and BOOM that guy decided he wasn't in fake love with Sally and was done with the show. OMG you guys it was so crazy you have no idea. Or maybe you do, I don't really know...

On a scale of Tony Stark is really Iron Man to Bruce Willis was dead the whole time I'll give the Bachelorette shocker a 3. I have no idea why my parents watch this junk when WWE RAW is right there on channel 105.